DEFINITIVE POWERFIELD SUBWOOFER PATCH

The PM700 comes in at a modest 16.75 inches tall. Sure, there are smaller bookshelf speakers out there. Lest you think that Def Tech is just being loose with the definition of a bookshelf speaker, like calling War and Peace a thin novel, let me assure you that's not the case. Here, ladies and gentlemen, available for the first time to ordinary human beings, is a bookshelf speaker with balls-er, I mean bass.

Thanks to Definitive Technology's PowerMonitor 700, you can now walk with your head held high and your tone controls set to neutral. Well, my friends, if you've known the heartache of basslessness, if you've ever been debassed, or if you're currently bassmentally challenged, your days of suffering are over. You convince yourself that it's all an illusion that the elite have created to keep the masses enslaved. (At this point, you don't care that your coworkers are beginning to talk behind your back.) Finally, you reach the stage where you deny there is any such thing as bass response.

DEFINITIVE POWERFIELD SUBWOOFER PATCH

(Unfortunately, there's no BassoDerm patch to get you through this stage.) Then, there's the embarrassing period when you just turn your receiver's bass control all the way up. First, there's the cravings, the unfulfilled feelings, and the depression. Those who have ever lived with bookshelf speakers sans subwoofer know the pain and suffering that's involved. Sometimes, you just can't include a subwoofer in your system (i.e., domestic harmony or space constraints simply won't allow it). However, while three-piece speaker systems can be great, they're not always the answer. The mere thought gets you all warm and goose-bumpy, doesn't it? Subwoofer/satellite systems have come close to producing such speaker nirvana-especially when you can hide the sub away and vehemently deny its existence until your buddies threaten to tear the place apart unless you come clean about the source of the bass.

Rarer still is that mythical, mystical creation, immortalized in song and story and lusted after by speaker designers since the invention of the voice coil: the bookshelf speaker with bass. Other combinations may be more desirable and more elusive: a multiterm politician with integrity, for example, or computer products that not only work as advertised but do so consistently (wow, what a concept!). There are some things you just don't expect to find together-say, peanut butter and foie gras or Anne Rice's vampire Lestat in a Garlique commercial.

Definitive powerfield subwoofer